Building Social Efficacy in Adolescence
Part Four in A Six-Part Series in The Thriving School Brief
Digging into the Social Efficacy portion of the Durable Skills for School and Beyond
“You’re Doing It Again.”
When I was an advisor, I spent one hour each day with a group of ninth through twelfth graders—students from every walk of life. Some came from stable, supportive homes; others faced homelessness, family instability, or significant mental health challenges. Yet in that single hour, we built something rare: a community that felt like family.
Advisory wasn’t an academic class; it was a place for connection. Students worked on independent projects, talked through challenges, and learned to hold one another accountable. Over time, we built a shared sense of safety and cohesion. They knew I cared deeply about them—and just as importantly, they cared for one another.
One of the most powerful things I ever heard was a student saying to a peer, “You’re doing it again.” It wasn’t criticism; it was compassion. It meant, I see you. I know this isn’t you at your best—and I believe you can do better. That moment captured social efficacy in a nutshell: students using their voices and relationships to help one another grow.
What Social Efficacy Looks Like
Social efficacy is the ability to listen, communicate, collaborate, and solve problems effectively with others. It’s how adolescents learn to belong to something larger than themselves.
This list is longer than the other durable skill areas—and that’s intentional. Social development is one of the most important and complex milestones of adolescence. During these years, the “social brain” is rapidly developing, making young people more sensitive to peer feedback, belonging, and social norms. That sensitivity can lead to missteps—but also provides an enormous opportunity for growth.
What Social Efficacy Looks Like:
I greet people and talk in a friendly way.
I listen carefully and make sure I understand before I respond.
I share my ideas, values, and needs with others.
I ask for help when I need it.
I take turns, listen, encourage others, and do my fair share.
I express myself respectfully and adjust how I act to fit the situation.
I respect everyone’s right to feel safe and heard, and I accept different viewpoints.
I work well with different people, try to understand them, and stay open to new ideas.
I solve conflicts in positive ways by using problem-solving steps.
I keep my promises and follow through on what I say I’ll do.
I take on different roles and responsibilities to get the job done.
I take responsibility for my words and actions and how they affect others.
I help make my class or community a better place to learn and grow.
I stand up for people when their rights or dignity are disrespected, and I speak up against bullying, prejudice, or harassment.
I step up for leadership roles or extra responsibilities in a group.
When students develop these habits, they gain the skills to connect, contribute, and lead. They learn to manage conflict, take perspective, and build trust—the foundation of a healthy school and civic community, where young people see themselves as contributors, not just participants.
Building Environments That Grow Social Efficacy
In the Classroom
Classrooms can become practice fields for collaboration, empathy, and repair when teachers intentionally build these experiences into learning.
Collaborative Problem-Solving: Use group work that truly requires interdependence. Rotate roles (facilitator, encourager, timekeeper) and debrief how well the team listened, adjusted, and supported one another. (Target behaviors: #5, #8, #11)
Feedback Protocols: Model how to give and receive constructive feedback using sentence stems (“I notice…, I wonder…, I appreciate…”). (Target behaviors: #2, #6, #10, #12)
In Public Spaces
Hallways, cafeterias, and assemblies are ideal for practicing empathy, adaptability, and community responsibility.
Mode Switching for Context: Teach students to “read the room”—Library Mode (quiet focus), Cafeteria Mode (social, respectful), Hallway Mode (purposeful movement), Assembly Mode (attentive listening).
(Target behaviors:#6, #7, #8)Peer Accountability: Encourage peers to notice and name helpful behavior (“Thanks for holding the door”) or gently redirect (“Let’s give people space”).
Target behaviors:#1, #5, #13
Supporting Students Needing Additional Support
When students struggle socially, interventions should rebuild connection, not increase a student's isolation.
Peer Mediation or Restorative Circles: Guide students to name harm, hear impact, and agree on next steps.
(Target behaviors:#9, #12, #13)Social Coaching Groups: Small groups practice communication scripts, role-play conflict resolution, and reflect on interactions.
(Target behaviors:#2, #3, #6, #8)
Connection + Responsibility = Belonging
When adolescents learn to communicate clearly, take perspective, and repair relationships, they gain more than social skills—they gain belonging. And when belonging is paired with responsibility, social efficacy becomes durable.
That’s how students move from needing adults to mediate every conflict to being able to say, “You’re doing it again,” and to mean it with care.
